Dearest Reader,
Does the thought of 'planning' fill you with horror? Or are you one of those who relishes lists, boxes and order? Truly I understand both responses.
But here I am thinking about a bigger picture than the very necessary and important approach to the every day events, tasks, and people. Please don't let me take you away from honouring the crucial details of life. God created the mountains, and the tiny flowers, and invisible micro-organisms that influence everything. What I want to share with you is an awareness of the bigger picture of 'planning'.
At one time I would have joined any of you sitting on the side lines of this 'game of life' thinking I had no influence or purpose with which to engage in the event happening before my eyes. But since I had to stop my teaching career because of exhaustion; and was led back to faith in God, with growing awareness of the Father, Son (Jesus Christ) and Holy Spirit making up the Oneness of God, my perception has changed. Lets say instead of me being the focus of action - even if I was providing for the needs of others, I have come to see myself as a vessel for God's love and purposes.
Dear Reader, before you throw your hands up in horror at the thought of simply being a vessel of God's Love and 'having' to do what He says - I want to fill in an important detail!! I reached absolute exhaustion in my work in education because I - me - was planning and responding to the demands of the work. But deep inside I was filled with a sense of worthlessness, and I was humanly able to survive only by doing work at the surface that served and thus I got some sense of worth from it. But I reached exhaustion - and God called me back to Him and led me into the church.
This is where the 'die-ing' comes in. In order to embrace what Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit were teaching me, I had to repent of trying to do things in my own strength - and I surrendered my 'life' (my selfish purposes) to God. Believe me, even the day I gave my life to Jesus - I sensed the Light that entered my darkened heart. I felt embraced by Love.
God is far more patient than we are, and He has led me over the years, both on an Inner Journey to bring freedom and Light into the trauma and suffering of my life as a child, and an outer journey of blessing others in His Spirit to the degree with which I had received His Love. I needed to learn that 'I was precious in God's eyes' not for anything I did - but because I was!! And you too dear Reader.
But in this knowledge lies the mystery of God's Love for His Son - and the One-ness of Love in die-ing humanly and trusting the Father for Resurrection. I slowly came to receive His Love in those places that had had no trust in anyone or anything; I came to see God's hand in all the trials of my life - NOT IN CAUSING them - but in 'turning all to Good for those that Love the Lord and His purposes'!
So very gradually His Love and Spirit has made me increasingly a vessel of His Love and Grace as I grew in acceptance of His Love, Purity and Grace. My broken human will is daily becoming conformed to God's will and purposes in all things, because I believe in my Oneness with His Love. So as a vessel of the Holy Spirit I need to plan, not simply for everyday things, but for those that serve God's purposes and Spirit:
*I see that my prayer for the 'broken-hearted', and those in authority, IS something to plan into the day... And my weekly on-line prayer for the world is expanding His love:
*that reading Scripture and the Fathers, as led by God, is worth planning into the day because they expand my awareness of God, Life, what it is to be human in Christ, and God's Work through us;
*going out for a walk is worth planning into my day because I go in His Love to meet people on the way and allow His Spirit to make contacts and share His Love;
* in Faith and Love to continue in praise and thanksgiving to plan and be led to committ to the online work; and writing; and iconography. They all need His Spiritual gifts in me and fulfil His purposes to guide, lead, bless, in His Name;
* and embracing all the above, plan to spend time in prayer, praying for more love for God, and for yourself, that you may love others more through His Holy Spirit, and come to know His Presence in your heart. Through deep healing in the Love of God you will have confidence in God's desire to heal and the way to help others in His Shielding.
So Dear Reader surrender to the Love that will not let you go, and in humility get to KNOW that you are Precious as a child of God. Allow Him to lead and purify you and to unite the ordinary everyday necessities of life with the Divine purposes of God to bring salvation of souls in His Love and Purpose, leading you into Life Eternal. Step by step surrendering all judgement of yourself and others to the merciful Cross, and Holy Heart of God. Amen.