I wonder if you have ever been told in words or attitude, ‘Grow up’ or ‘Keep your problems to yourself’, by someone who did not appear to recognise or want to know your feelings or needs. I guess children suffer this a great deal. And I wonder if you too have conveyed this message to someone? I’m sure I have, sometimes knowingly, knowing that the occasion was not right for a heart to heart. There are times when we simply need to ‘get on with the task in hand’ and we cannot always wear our heart on our sleeve. However anyone who has learned to ‘get on with it’ and live in total denial of their pain, lives a half-hearted life. And this denial is not maturity. I speak from experience.
Since I have had time to get to know the love received through life in Christ, and latterly to face my own deep pains with Him, I am much less likely to do this ‘sticking plaster’ behaviour, to myself or others. But I also know that I cannot ‘fix’ anyone, nor be ‘fixed’ by the human words of another. These words from the rational mind simply wound more deeply and separate the individual even more from Truth and Wholeness in Christ.
Through the Holy Spirit I have come to know the power of prayer, for myself, and for others which unites within and does not divide. I also know that facing the pain in my heart and inviting the Holy Spirit to untangle the mess of my prideful ‘intelligence’, allows me to repent my wilful denial of God’s love. Through repentance we receive the power of His healing love and Presence, and can live His Word and promise to overcome our apparent losses.
In maturity, gained through the process of purification and obedience to His love working through us, we develop child-like trust in the Life we have, leading us to Salvation and liberation of our souls. Thus we believe every trial is gift, and we don’t grumble, but seek His face. We increasingly find that service to those that God loves or is calling to Him, though in Love, is dispassionate, but gentle. Things that used to be a chore, are within the same Heavenly love as those that we used to love and prefer, because they are all in, and for Christ. All things are for, and in, the Kingdom, and give us greater understanding of ‘wholeness’ in Christ.
We come to know that, despite our efforts, some sin still seems to hang around, and can leap out at unexpected moments!! I am still attacked by ‘loneliness’ and selfish desires to try and comfort myself……..but I have gone to the depths of hell in relation to my history, and I know ‘that nothing separates me from the love of God’. If I turn my mind to give thanks and praise Him, these thoughts and associated feelings go, as my mind is open to the Holy Spirit and I find myself praying for others, or reminded of some other activity which is needed.
In this way we come to know more of God and His ways, and thus recognise His work in us. We come to see areas that are still to be redeemed, but trust in His timing and Holy Spirit. These latter areas are frequently the ‘source’ of separation and sin alive in us but we learn to guard against sin having control of our lives through constant prayer. St Paul told us with wisdom that we should ‘pray at all times’.
So let us seek and pray for ‘maturity in Christ’:
-Child like trust in the Father through the Holy Spirit
-Serving as the Father invites us through opportunity
-Balance in our humanity
-Allowing all that is in the dark to be redeemed through the Cross – but not being controlled by ‘feelings’ or allowing sin to rule
-Know yourself
-Keep your heart open to know more of God’s mystery
Loving Lord Jesus Christ, redeem us from our childishness and either false trust in others to bear our burdens, or pride that we can manage alone. May we have Your compassionate ears to hear when others are in need, that through prayer and Your listening ear and heart in us, they may find the True Comforter and the Hope we have in You. May Your compassion and wisdom guide all we say and do. Amen